New City, New Outlook, New Life

I've officially been in SF for 25 days. 25! That's insane!

It feels like I've been here forever. It feels like I've finally come home. I must say I'm completely in love with the City (which is what the locals call it, so whenever I mention "the city," I do not mean New York, ya dig?).

If you asked me to describe exactly what I love about it, this would be my reply in list form:

• the architecture
• the food
• the people
• the outlook on life
• the walking
  
• the farmer's markets
• the ferry building
• the water
• the bridges
• the cityscape
• the culture
• the hills
• the weather (although I hear it has been exceptionally sunny for June)
  
• the trolley
• the possibilities

To say I'm happy is an understatement. I finally feel whole again, like little pieces of my soul were scattered about this city just waiting for me to come find them. It's like being in love, not with a person, but an idea.

For the first time in a long, long time, I'm living my life for my life, not my career. My purpose is to be happy, to love what's around me and drink it all in every second I can.

I am home.

A bit funny that I am isolated from my friends and family, and this is the first time I can recall being this happy. The last time I was this isolated was when I lived in Rome for five months, where I had a MUCH different outlook, but also was in a much different situation. Now, I feel like I'm meant to be alone, floating out in my universe, just stopping back in for moments. I get lonely, sure, but I've grown so much by being alone.

Little by little I'm more willing to do what I want to do and not what others would like to do. I'm realizing more and more who's worth keeping in touch with and who is not. I'm learning people will always come and go in your life, but you will always have yourself and gosh darnit, you better love who you are and what you stand for because it will come down to just you. To quote one of the saddest movies ever (Up in the Air), "we all die alone." So true.

My intention with this post was not to be morbid and depressing though, I'm simply trying to make a point that I think my soul is a bit different than some. I'm a wanderer. I'm an observer. I will forever keep moving, letting those I love catch up with me from time to time.